12-21-2018

Mary’s Minute

“I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.”

                                                                 ~ Charles Dickens

Christmas, and the holiday season in general, is not a day but a feeling.  Whether or not you celebrate Christmas a religious holiday or not, it still represents a season of love and giving. 

The simplest way that I can describe the feeling of Christmas for me is love.  Giving of gifts is not about the material item, but about giving to people for whom we care. Sharing a meal is not simply about indulging in delicious food, but about sharing time with people who are special to us.

There may be things in our life that are challenging or situations that make us sad, but this time of year, we can find joy. 

Yesterday, Tara and I had lunch with Pat and Sheila Clark, who have endured much sadness.  Yet, Pat and Sheila find joy in living and giving.   

This time of year, we are quick to offer a greeting of “Happy Holidays” or “Merry Christmas” to strangers.  There is love in our hearts and our voices.

My hope is that the love that we feel this season can stay with you throughout the entire year!

                                           Christmas love to you all!

                                                                          Mary

12-14-2018

Mary’s Minute

“Deliberately seek opportunities for kindness, sympathy, and patience.”

                                            ~ Evelyn Underhill                                                                                        

In today’s world, we all have been faced with talking to an automated service, “For English press or say one.”  It usually begins with simple enough questions, but can quickly progress to pure frustration for me.  I have found myself almost screaming, “I want to speak to a representative!”  My voice gets louder and more frustrated with each automated response, “I don’t understand; please restate the reason for your call.”  

Recently I have made a conscious effort to be more calm and kind to automated services.  I know that a computer doesn’t have feelings, but I have decided that for my own sake I want to practice kindness.  I have started saying “please” and “thank you” to a computerized voice. What I realized is that by being patient, soft spoken, and polite, regardless of the circumstances, I feel better myself. An added benefit is that I get practice in an important skill.

I want to be more kind, sympathetic, and patient to people because I want them to feel loved and cared for, but I also know that being kind makes the person offering kindness feel better. I need to do all I can to practice the important skill! “I will connect you to a representative now.”

                                       Have a great week! 

                                                    Mary

12-7-2018

Mary’s Minute

“There are more honest people and more good people than there are thieves and bad people. It's just always been that way.”  

                                                        ~ Michael Nesmith

This quote precisely sums up the story I wanted to share this week.  At the end of my somewhat hectic story, I was left with a feeling that there is more good (much more good) than bad in the world! 

Last week I was at a conference in Indianapolis and during a reception staged in an open lobby area of the Westin I hung my coat on the rack provided.  I left the reception, leaving my coat behind for another meeting in the same hotel.  When I received a fraud alert that my credit card that I left in the coat pocket, along with my driver’s license and a little cash, was being used, I rushed to the coat rack to find my coat and its contents gone. 

The Westin front desk clerk, Cooper, quickly involved the security supervisor, who started watching surveillance video.  In the meantime I Ubered to my hotel to avoid the cold without my coat.  (Sidebar – I Pricelined and stayed at a different hotel to save $$.)  About an hour later I received a call from Justin who told me he had good news and bad news.  He had recovered my coat, but not the contents.  I had already cancelled my credit card and knew I could easily get a replacement license, so I wasn’t disappointed.  The great part of the story is that Justin tracked down the people who took my coat (found them swimming in the hotel pool) with the woman in the group wearing my coat!  It gets even better – Cooper, the desk clerk, delivered my coat to me!  I was overwhelmed by their good, which for me far out-weighed the negativity of losing my cc and license. 

This story is not about a cold night in Indy, but about all the good there is in the world.  We may get discouraged when we watch the news, with our jobs, or with the students in our classrooms, but when we look around, we know that there is much, much more good than bad.  I want to focus on the good! 

                                                         Have a great week!

                                                                          Mary

11-30-2018

Mary’s Minute

“The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.”          

                                                                                  ~ Bertrand Russell 

I recently wrote about how believe it is good to follow our feelings to make decisions.  I included in my column that my son, Bill, doesn’t share my belief in intuition.  I shared with him that I had written about him.  He quickly corrected me saying that he did believe in intuition and went onto explain that our definitions of intuition probably differ.  He explained that for him intuition is making decisions based on subconscious ideas and analyses, not “magic” (insert snarky look).    

I think he is right in that sometimes we follow our intuition believing it is a revelation that came from nowhere, when in fact it is based on our subconscious thoughts.  After all, our brains have a lot in them that we surely cannot fully consciously utilize. 

Here is where Bill and I differ.  I also believe in magic or miracles – in the unexplainable.  I think Bill is right that we are guided by subconscious thoughts that feel like they come from nowhere.  I also believe that sometimes our feelings really do come from a place that is unexplainable. 

Rational thought is valuable, and the basis for making most good decisions.  I am not proposing we run our lives and our classrooms by being guided by our feelings totally.  I do believe that sometimes our feelings – our intuition -- can guide us in the right direction.  Sometimes we do what “feels right” because we have the knowledge in our subconscious mind, and other times it is just (insert snarky grin) “magic.”

                                                                        Have a great week!

                                                                                               Mary

11-16-2018

Mary’s Minute

“I believe in intuitions and inspirations…I sometimes FEEL that I am right.  I do not KNOW that I am.

                                                                           ~ Albert Einstein

Albert Einstein is known as one of the greatest scientists of all time, yet even he believed in intuition – in following our feelings.  I recently found myself in a new situation, and I stood perplexed about what to do, wanting to make the right decision.  Finally someone said, “There is no right or wrong way, just do what feels good.”  I quickly became at ease and was able to make a quick decision.  The event quickly passed, but the words stuck with me. They helped me reflect on the value of following your feelings.  I have this debate with my son, Bill, because as a man of science, he does not see the value in intuition that I do.  I argue that just because we do not understand why our feelings are accurate, does not mean that it can’t be true. 

Even Einstein accepted the need to accept what your heart says.  Sometimes it is your first thought, rather than the careful analytical process, that can offer the best direction. 

Intuition is not a license to avoid problem solving or proven research, but it is permission to value our feelings to lead us in the right direction towards happiness, success, helping others, and making good decisions. 

                                                                  Have a great week!

                                                                                 Mary

11-9-2018

Mary’s Minute

“What you do speaks so loud that I can’t hear what you say.”

                                                                       ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have smiled this week thinking about the kind students we have at Perry Central.  The most significant incident that made me reflect on this was a visit from the Indianan Department of Education.  Our afterschool programs were both observed as part of a state evaluation process.  In addition to the paperwork review, the state official spent about an hour walking around Lights On and CIA, observing and talking with students.  Her number one take away is that our students are good to each other.  She said that she did not observe a single incident of children being unkind, and sadly she said that when she does these visits she always does.  She observed our students being inclusive and kind to each other.  We know that students are not always kind, but it is good to see from an outside perspective that they usually are.

In addition, I had a couple of routine interactions with students that made me smile this week.  One was watching a young man stop outside the exterior door on his way to the ag building to participate in the pledge and moment of silence.  When I complimented him, he beamed and thanked me.  Right after that a girl held the door open for me and wished me a good day.  I know they are little things, but little things matter and create a culture of caring – and a world of caring.

We certainly want to do things that overtly and systemically support a caring culture; the kindness club is a great example of this.  Obviously, our students’ parents and our caring community are enormous contributors.  But I am incredibly proud of all of you for being role models for our students of how to treat people with kindness and respect.  Your actions speak louder than anything we can say.  You treat each other and our students with kindness each day, and it is reflected in their actions.  Thank you! 

                                                                          Have a great week!

                                                                                        Mary

11-2-2018

Mary’s Minute

“He who moves not forward goes backward.”

~ Goethe

This is a common fairly common expression we all have heard and probably said.  When we embrace a life – both personally and professionally – of continual improvement, the expression has special meaning.

We are either moving towards our goals or away from them.  One concrete way I think about this is with weight loss. For me, I feel like I am either gaining or losing weight!  I would like to think that I could get to a healthy weight and maintain, but for me it just has never worked!

I think the same can be said for accomplishments.  I want to always be moving forward, but in reality there are times that for whatever reason I am not.  When I don’t move forward, I slip a bit back. 

My cousin, who is a motivational speaker and uses juggling and unicycles to illustrate his points, explains that when riding a unicycle you cannot stand still.  Think about it – you either pedal forward or pedal backwards. 

If we embrace Goethe”s guidance, then we must accept that to accomplish our goals, we have to push forward at all times.  There is no neutral, only forward and reverse.  Let’s choose forward!

                                                         Have a great week!

                                                                             Mary

10-26-2018

Mary’s Minute

“Live your life and forget your age.”

                                                           ~ Norman Vincent Peale

I just finished reading Ed Whitcomb’s third book that he wrote about sailing solo around the world.  He began the journey in his 70s and completed the goal 10 years later right before he settled in Perry County.  (I highly recommend Cilin II: A solo Sailing Odyssey: The Closest Point to Heaven.)

He began the journey after he had served as Governor of Indiana and retired from a successful career as an attorney.  He was feeling lost in life when he decided to sail the Greek Islands. Circumferencing the earth became a goal shortly after he began sailing in the Mediterranean and met others who were on such a journey.

I was inspired by his story.  Although I loved reading about his adventures, most of what I appreciated is that age was not a factor in his decision or his drive. 

I had a similar reaction when I read an autobiography of my great aunt.  In her 50s she retired and moved across the country.  Her “retirement” didn’t last long, as she soon started a booming business.

Ed Whitcomb and my Aunt Eleanore didn’t focus on their age, but rather on living.  Maybe not so coincidentally, they both lived into their late nineties. Age is just a number, and life is a wonderful adventure regardless of our number.

        

                                                                         Have a great week!

                                                                                           Mary

10-12-2018

Mary’s Minute

“Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going.”

                                                                 ~ Tennessee Williams

Have you ever thought about the difference between memory and memories?  On Bloom’s Taxonomy remembering is considered a very low level skill.  We strive to push our students to higher order thinking, going beyond simply remembering to analyzing and creating.  Memories can be so rich that they go beyond simple low-level remembering of facts, evoking emotions that push us to higher levels of thinking.

I remember a lot from my days in school, at least I assume that is where I learned many basic skills I use today.  Memories from my school days are different.  I don’t have many, but the ones I have are powerful.  One of my memories is of my senior English teacher, Mrs. Gondring doing a scene for the class as Lady MacBeth.  It is a memory that far exceeds anything I could have been asked to remember by spewing facts on a test. 

A keen memory is nice – it can be helpful for high stakes tests, trivia games and being thoughtful on special dates. I think what is more important than memory is memories.  In our own life and with our students, our real success may come not in remembering, but in creating memories that bridge the emotional and intellectual.

                                                  Have a great fall break!

                                                                                      Mary

10-5-2018

Mary’s Minute

“There is no truth. There is only perception.”  

                                                                          ~ Gustave Flaubert

We often say and do things with one intent, but ultimately what counts is how what we say or do is interpreted.  If we have love in our hearts, but the person we are talking to interprets what we say as being negative, the negativity is what is spread.  I was giving my son some advice about how what he says comes across to people, he asked, “Is that what it means or what they interpret it to mean?”  My response was that it doesn’t matter. 

We may have the best lesson planned and think we are saying all the right things to our students, but ultimately what counts is their interpretation.

We care deeply about our students and people around us, but sometimes what we say or do can be interpreted differently. In the end, perception is reality. 

The lesson in this phenomena of understanding is two-fold. First, we when we express ourselves we need to not only consider what we are saying but consider how what we say is interpreted. Second, as receivers of information, we need to strive to seek true understanding which can beyond initial perceptions to a deeper understanding of the person’s intent. My hope is that we always give each other the benefit of the doubt by assuming the intention was a positive one. 

                                                                  Have a great week!

                                                                                         Mary

9-28-2018

Mary’s Minute

“The more you know about yourself, the more patience you have for what you see in others.”

                                                                                        ~ Erik Erikson

The act of empathy is a powerful lens to see the world.  When we understand how others are feeling, we are better able to help.  A giant step in being empathetic is knowing ourselves.    We live with ourselves 24-7, and some of us having been living with ourselves for many years!  Still, how much time do we take to think about who we are, what makes us happy, how we relate to others, what are our strengths, what are our weaknesses? 

We can get to know ourselves by allowing some quiet time to reflect on questions and maybe time to just be.  Time spent in reflection will pay off as we learn about ourselves, and then translate that into patience with others. 

For instance, if we discover that it makes us happy when people compliment us, we will be more likely to compliment others.  When we realize that we learn better when we are given quiet time, we are more likely to give our students the space they need. 

We are all connected.  Our actions affect others, whether we like it or not.  We want to be patient with others, and the first step to that is knowing ourselves.

                                                          Have a great week!

                                                                                           Mary

9-24-2018

Mary’s Minute

"80 percent of success is just showing up"

                                                            —Woody Allen

The best advice I try to give students heading off to college is, “Go to class.”  College can be a pretty tough adjustment, and university level coursework is difficult, not to mention the challenges of newfound freedom.  College students who simply show up are well on their way to success – Woody Allen would say 80% there. 

The Department of Education and the Perry Central School Board have declared September as Attendance Awareness Month.  Showing up matters.  Teachers know that students who often struggle the most are the ones who are not present.  We know that habits formed early carry over to adulthood, and employers tell us that attendance is one of their top challenges.

Just like our students, we all have reasons why we need to miss work, but just like our students it is important that we remember showing up matters.  Students learn more when they are in school.  As employees we have a greater impact when we are here.  When students miss class, it not only hurts them, but it hurts their classmates as the teacher is forced to spend time catching up.  The same is true for employees; when we miss work, it puts a burden on our co-workers. 

Life is not always easy.  Our work with our students is challenging.  It is reassuring to know that we are well on our way to success, simply by showing up.  Thanks for all you do!

                                          

                                                            Have a great week!

                                                                         Mary

        

                                

9-14-2018

Mary’s Minute

“When you spend your time worrying, you’re simply using your imagination to create things you don’t want.”

                                                                       ~ Shannon L. Adler

The Boy Scout motto is to be prepared, and part of that means anticipating what can go wrong.  How do we balance, anticipating the bad that can be possible in order to avoid it, and filling our mind with negativity?  Worry is dwelling on the things we don’t want to happen and that are often out of our control.

Our imaginations are powerful tools for creating possibilities.  The talk inside our heads becomes the fodder for what we believe and how we behave.

When worry fills our minds, with the wheels spinning about all that can go wrong, we are wasting powerful thought that could be creating new ideas and events. 

We often say to ourselves or others, “Don’t worry,” but in reality it isn’t a switch we can turn off.  We can, however, fill our minds with possibilities of good whether than defeatist options.  When you find yourself, sleepless imagining the worst case scenario, instead imagine the best case scenario and envision what that would look like.  Focus on the things we can control and imagine the very best.

There are times when we need to put on our Scout hat in order to think of the negative possibilities in order to prepare, but it is important to trade that cap for our thinking caps most of the time, as we imagine all the great things that are possible when we let our imaginations take over.

                                                                    Have a great week!

                                                                                     Mary

9-7-2018

Mary’s Minute

“When I am an old woman I shall wear purple.”

                                                                ~ Jenny Joseph

People who know me, know that purple is probably my least favorite color, but I love this excerpt from the Jenny Joseph poem, that expresses how as we get older we are better able to express ourselves. 

As we become older we are less concerned about what people think and are able to live life without worry of judgment.  Part of that is maturity, and maybe part of it is gaining courage. 

Courage to take risks without a fear of failure is the kind of courage that we have as babies learning to walk and talk, not fearful of making mistakes.  During our middle years we lose that sense of bravery, fearing judgment of others. 

The older we get perhaps the more comfortable we become in our own skin, less fearful of making mistakes. 

I doubt I my closet becomes filled with shades of lavender, but I do know that with age I am okay being me.  I have come to grips with what is important to me and how I can influence others to in some tiny way make the world a better place.  I know I will continue to stumble, but my blunders don’t hurt my feelings nearly as much as they once did.  Whatever age you are, I hope that you can “wear purple.”

           

                                                                 Have a great week!

                                                                                       Mary

8-31-2018

Mary’s Minute

“Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.”

                                                    ~ Mother Teresa

My message for this week is pretty simple.  It can be summed up in just one word – smile.  A smile is so simple, yet it sends a message to others that we care, and it has personal healing powers for the smiler.

Smiling to spread love like Mother Teresa describes is great, but it is also important to smile for yourself.  As silly as it may sound, smile in front of the mirror. When you wake up each morning, smile.  When you are sad, mad, or lonely, force yourself to physically smile.  When you are ready to cry, smile.  Before you write out a strong email, smile.  When you just have that overall sad feeling, smile.  When you feel overwhelmed, smile.

I talk about how being happy is a choice, but the truth is sometimes no matter how hard we try, we cannot simply will ourselves to be happy.  Smiling is a concrete thing that we can do to help.

I have tried it, and at first it feels awkwardly painful and fake, but as the smile spreads from your mouth to your eyes there is a physical release of tension.  Smiling will not solve all of your troubles, and it may not even totally shift your mood.  I promise you that it will help, even if it is just a little bit. 

                                                      Enjoy your long weekend

                                                                      and smile!

                                                                                             Mary

8-24-2018

Mary’s Minute

“Come in and try the worst coffee one woman on Tripadvisor had in her life.”

                                                                                 ~ Coffee shop sign

This made me chuckle, but then it made me think.  Apparently social media and trip site posts can make or break businesses, so a comment on Tripadvisor citing the “worst coffee” could be a real problem for a coffee shop.  The owners decided to embrace the criticism and use it for a laugh and a sort of publicity.  In other words, they took a negative and did their best to turn it into a positive. 

There are bad things that happen in life that are tough to turn around and see any good.  Some things in life are just unexplainable and bad/sad!  Even in those situations, we attempt to find the silver lining.  We strive to use the experience for strength or learning.

In the case of the sign, the coffee shop owners, may have used the criticism to look at their quality control, as well as the impetus for a humorous sign.

In the case of tragedies (and please do not think I am making light of tragedy by comparing it to a coffee shop sign) we gain courage or the motivation to help those in need.  It is tough to see any good in sadness.  The hope is that by pulling together for the good of all, we can make the world better even in (especially in) dark times. 

     

                                                                     Thanks for all you do!

                                                                                     Mary

8-17-2018

Mary’s Minute

“The greatest gifts you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence.”

                                                                      ~ Denis Waitley

As humans we are social creatures, naturally dependent on one another.  Our notions of independence are called into question at this time of year when many parents send their children off to college.  Independence is an interesting topic, whether we are talking about our own children, children in our classrooms, or within our own relationships. 

As parents we strive to give our children a strong foundation so that they can become independent adults.  As teachers we work to create students who can think for themselves and tackle new learning tasks on their own.  Psychology tells us that the healthiest relationships exist when individuals balance independence with their dependence on one another. 

Being dependent on others by providing healthy support is human nature.  We are social beings, who need each other.  Like all things, there needs to be a balance. 

As we send our children off to college, we may struggle with where that healthy balance lies.  Helicopter parenting goes too far one way, yet we also know that our children always need our unconditional love.  The same is true for the children in our care. 

                                                           Have a great week!

                                                                       Mary

8-10-2018

Mary’s Minute

“If you stay ready, you won’t have to get ready.”

           

When you find out that the Governor of the State of Indiana is going to visit your school three days after the opening day, there isn’t much time to get ready.  Sure, people sprang into action.  Jeremy and Chris made the place shine, Josh Craney and the Commodore Manufacturing team spruced up their facility, Commodore Manufacturing team leaders rehearsed their presentation, and Jody French meticulously worked through the details of the visit.  These adjustments were just icing on the cake.

The Governor and his team liked what they saw and were very complimentary of the work of Perry Central and our business partners, Jasper Engines and Waupaca Foundry.  Our students spoke eloquently about their student-run business that incorporates hands-on production, along with other important skills like, problem solving, safety and team work.  This work didn’t happen in three days.  Our students were ready; they didn’t have to get ready. 

Our students deserve to the best learning opportunities every single day.  We all deserve to live life to its fullest every day.  Don’t wait!  When we do the right things for the right reasons – both in our lives and in our jobs, we will be ready.  We never know the day the Governor is going to visit.  There may not be time to get ready; we need to be ready! 

                                                                Have a great week!

                                                                                  Mary