9-10-2021

 

Mary’s Minute

“There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots, the other, wings.” 

                                                                                                         ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

My children and I have developed a tradition over the last ten years or so of celebrating all three of their birthdays, which all fall within 15 days, with a nice dinner out.  “Birthday Dinner” is something we talk about all year, and an evening I love because we are all together. 

Bill and Zoe both are headed to their respective California universities, and Jess at 33 has long been “on his own.” Bill turns 21 this weekend, so in that sense, it feels like they have all reached “adulthood.”

I have always had a keen sense that I was exceedingly fortunate to have my children in my life, but that they were not “mine.”  They have always been very much their own people.  And now as they go off on their own, I feel it even more.  I don’t take for granted the gift of having them in my life through their childhood and now as adults. 

As we have navigated life together, I hope that they have developed roots and wings in order to be happy, kind, and hardworking adults.  They laugh that growing up we had just one rule in our house, and that was to love one another.  I believe that if you love one another, everything else will fall into place.  I didn’t need to make a rule about picking up toys because if you loved one another, you wanted to help keep the house neat.  If you loved one another, you didn’t hit or yell.  Loving one another meant that you were home on time in order to be respectful.  They look back and admit that I was pretty lenient, and I look back and hope that they always felt loved and will carry that love with them into adulthood. 

This weekend as we celebrate Birthday Dinner, I will propose a toast to their roots and wings!  Then we will laugh as they order whatever they want, and say, “Treat yo’ self.”

                                                                                                 To roots and wings!

                                                                                                                   Mary