5-29-2020

Mary’s Minute

“You can design and create, and build the most wonderful place in the world. But it takes people to make the dream a reality.”

                                    ~ Walt Disney

This has been a busy week for me, but also really awesome.  My daughter, Zoe, and her boyfriend have come to stay with me for the summer.  I have enjoyed being alone in my apartment over the last few months, and although it isn’t Disney World, it has been my little castle.  Yet, without people, the dream never felt complete.  Now, we may be crowded, but having people here makes my dreams come true. 

I was okay during quarantine.  I learned to enjoy my time alone and the routines I formed around my simple life.  I was going through the motions.

Each day this week, Zoe has gone on walks with me.  We have had dinner crowded on the coffee table in the kitchen/living room.  We have worked on our computers with the television playing in the background.  Nothing special, yet I have felt more complete.  

There are laughs, there are simple conversations, and there is joy in having people who you care about near you!  I wish my words could express the smile that having people near me brings!

Wishing you a wonderful world, filled with people you love!                              ~ Mary

5-22-2020

Mary’s Minute

“I don't believe you ever get closure on anything. Things leave a permanent mark on you.”                                                                          ~ Allison Anders

Today was the last day of the 2019-2020 school year.  This would have been the annual end of the year breakfast, my first as Sheridan superintendent.  I would have had the opportunity to express my gratitude to the Sheridan staff for their wonderful start to my time here and congratulate them on a great school year.  It would be a day full of good byes and best wishes – a way to say good bye to the school year.  Likewise, yesterday students would have hugged their teachers and friends.  Seniors would have walked the halls, yelled some hoorays, and shed a few tears. 

Instead of saying good bye and feeling a sense of closure for a successful year, this week felt fairly mundane.  I shouldn’t speak for all staff and students, but for me yesterday and today felt like the days before – not good not bad, just another day.  Certainly, I feel no sense of closure.  I think this is what most seniors who mourn is that lack of closing this incredibly important phase of their live.

We need to ask ourselves if we need closure, or do we just keep living, and graciously accept the permanent mark that all of our experiences leave upon us?  Maybe closure is over-rated.  I know it is hard for me to grasp that right now, but I am trying.  I am a crier (just ask my kids), and closure for me equates to nostalgia, which for me leads to tears.  No tears today, but certainly these last few months have left marks on me.  I am trying to take it all in and decide if closure is necessary. 

I think this year we traded closure for confusion.  Either way, as we think back on our experiences – seniors reflecting on their entire school career, teachers as they think of the school year, or me as I consider my first few months in a new community, we may not have closure, but we definitely have memories.  Let us savor those!

                                                            I wish you well!

                                                                        Mary

5-15-2020

Mary’s Minute

“The things that make us different – those are our superpowers.”

                                                                                          ~ Lena Waithe

Super Man knew he had x-ray vision, and he knew how to use it.  It was one of his superpowers – one of the things that made him different.  We all have things that make us different, but we often don’t stop to think about what makes us unique. We especially don’t think about our uniqueness as superpowers.

With Mother’s Day last weekend, I want to use my mom as an example to talk about superpowers.  My mom is often described as a “hoot,” meaning she is fun and entertaining.  She is also known for her kindness.  I also can’t think of my mom without thinking of her flowers and how she loves to tinker in them.  These are some of the things that make her unique; these are her superpowers.  

As the school year ends, we are reminded of the superpowers of our teachers and school staff.  Giving our students love through this challenging time certainly took superpowers!

Superman knew how to use his powers for the good, and I think that we all do too, but perhaps we are not as overt as Superman.  I don’t mean that we need to put on a cape and attempt to save the world, but I do think that we should take an inventory of what makes us unique and be more explicit about using our superpowers for good. 

Another way to think about this is to think about using our gifts, but today the idea of superpowers struck me as more appealing!  You may not be able to leap over tall builders or catch a speeding bullet, but if you take time to think of what makes you unique, you will be amazed at what you can do!

                                                                      Believe in your power!

                                                              Mary

5-8-2020

Mary’s Minute

“The child in you, like all children, loves to laugh, to be around people who can laugh at themselves and life. Children instinctively know that the more laughter we have in our lives, the better.”

                                                                       ~ Wayne Dyer

I think my favorite sound in the world is that of children’s laughter -- that little giggle that can unfold into a roaring belly laugh.  As adults we long to be child-like – to experience pure joy in the here and now like children often seem more capable of doing than adults.

Laughter is scientifically proven to be good for us.  We know that anxiety can be caused by fixation of unknowns and things that our out of our control.  One of the beauties of laughter is that it is purely in the present.  To laugh is to live in the moment and to find such joy and amusement that our body outwardly reacts.

Although we value laughter, as adults we also have been taught that there is a time and place to laugh.  It can be considered rude or disrespectful to laugh in certain moments.  To laugh is viewed as not taking something seriously, so as adults we feel the need to be guarded.

During this time, we are feeling pretty serious, after all our world, our country, and we are dealing with some pretty serious stuff.  Yet now more than ever it is okay to laugh.  In fact, it is what we need.  We need to find joy in the moment that is so deep it comes out as laughter. 

The best relationships we have are ones that include laughter.  The good times we remember in life often include laughter.

Laughter is a gift. You deserve that gift.  Let yourself laugh like a child, focusing, not in the past or future, but in the moment and the fun it holds!

                                                      Stay safe and well and please laugh!

           

                                                                   Mary

5-1-2020

Mary’s Minute

This week I had a total of 15 Zoom/WebEx meetings.  In a typical week, I would have more than 15 meetings with people, so why can virtual meetings seem more exhausting?  As humans – especially extroverts – there is an exchange of energy when we share a physical space. 

I do not have the psychology terms to explain it, but I know that sitting across the table from someone, shaking someone’s hand, sharing a laugh – simply sharing the same space – creates an exchange of energy that cannot be recreated in a virtual meeting or by greeting people in public from behind a mask six feet apart.

For years, proponents have tried to get buy-in to using technology to increase efficiency and reduce travel.  The current pandemic has forced us to embrace technology to communicate more effectively. 

We are all getting pretty good at logging into meetings, Zooming has become a new commonly-used verb, and knowing how to mute/unmute is a snap.  We are getting work done; we are doing what needs to be done.  Yet, we feel disconnected (no pun intended) much of the time. 

I think it is safe to say that we have all gotten better at using virtual tools than we were a few months ago.  In the past, we likely FaceTimed with family and used WebEx for occasional work meetings, but we are taking this to a whole new level.  For over six weeks, I have only seen my three kids and my mom on a screen and have not sat down at a conference table across from a single colleague.  All of these common interactions are now on-screen. 

I am thankful for virtual contact with colleagues and my family, and I am not being reflecting on this phenomenon in order to be negative.  I think that considering the issue helps me better understand my own needs and will make me even more appreciative of personal contact!  Until then, Zoom, Zoom, Zoom! 

                                                                Stay safe and well!

                                                                                 Mary