1-30-2015

Mary’s Minute

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.”                          Havelock Ellis

 “Abundance is a process of letting go; that which is empty can receive.”                    ~ Bryant McGill

 

     The phrase and concept of “letting go,” has been recently popularized by the song from Disney’s Frozen.  We use the term loosely sometimes with friends, and other times struggle to deal with letting go with pain or anger.  Letting go can mean a lot of different things.  It can mean forgiving ourselves, forgiving others, moving forward with new ideas, or letting go of something painful.  I was intrigued by the notion in the Ellis quote – the balance between letting go and holding on.  The greatest example in my life that I recall of that concept is in how I dealt with losing my dad.  I remember how I cried every day, and although I wanted to be able to function, I also didn’t want to let go too much that I would forget.  Holding on can mean keeping beautiful memories close to our hearts and learning from our experiences, but the delicate balance falls in not letting the past paralyze us.    

     Although we always need to learn from our past, there are certain feelings that we must release in order to live healthy, happy lives.  Holding on to bitterness, only hurts us.  That is where the McGill quote is helpful.  We know that hatred hurts the hater, not the hated.  When we harbor bad feelings for ourselves or others, or we hold on to old ideas, we fill space that can be filled with happiness and new beginnings. 

     Yes, we need to hold on to memories and learn from our mistakes, but we also must learn to, in the words of Elsa, “Let it go!” 

                                                                                    Have a great week!

                                                                                    Mary

1-23-2015

Mary’s Minute

“Only when it is dark enough can we see the stars.” – Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

When we are faced with tough times, we have two choices:  moving forward, seeing the challenge as an opportunity for growth; or blaming others and staying stagnant.  Nobody likes adversity, but when we can use it as a way to become better it is easier to face.  I am proud to be part of the Perry Central team, and when we get occasional setbacks we like to look at them as a way for us to improve.  We want to be the very best we can be.  We love it when things go well, and we can celebrate the successes of our students and staff.  We only get better when we can see our deficiencies, though.  Although both personally and professionally, it is great when things are going well, but when we have dark moments we can appreciate the good and gain strength to be and do more!

                                                                                Have a great week!

              Mary

1-16-2015

Mary’s Minute

 

“Eventually you can get into the nuts and bolts of reality: nurturing, caring, and getting along.”

~ Jody Watley

I appreciate the opportunity to serve on the Branchville Correctional Facility advisory committee and attend meetings there on a quarterly basis to hear about their new initiatives.  I recall a few years ago being happy to hear about their philosophy of rehabilitation with their major goal of reducing recidivism among offenders.  It seems like the obvious answer, but it differs from an approach of punishment.  I remember thinking about the core similarities between their work and ours in education.  Education is not about punishment, but about changing behaviors.  The advisory committee met again this week, and Branchville employees and offenders shared insights with our committee.  One offender talked about how his life changed when he realized that people care about him.  He said he spent his life being selfish – not caring about other people and not believing that anyone cared about him.  He said that when he realized that perfect strangers cared about him, it changed his life.  Branchville is striving to give offenders skills and attitudes so that when they are released they will be productive members of society.  I in no way want to insult our students by comparing them to prison inmates, but I cannot help but draw a comparison to the power of caring in every aspect of life.  Perry Central students learn because they know they are surrounded by caring adults.  Caring matters!  It truly is the nuts and bolts of reality.

Thank you for caring, and have a great week!

Mary

1-9-2015

Mary’s Minute

 “Not only our actions, but also our omissions, become our destiny.”

                                                                     ― Abraham Verghese

 

“It is not only what we do, but also what we do not do, for which we are accountable.”

                                                                                                 ― Molière

 

I feel strongly that at the most basic level life is about treating people with respect and kindness.  I know that sometimes I fail, and when I do I hope that I always apologize and work to do better.  I want to be aware of my actions and to be accountable for them.  My fear is for the things that I do not do, or the mistakes that I make for which I am not aware.  I never want to hurt people, but it is even worse if I make a mistake and don’t know about it.  Although I have to admit that sometimes ignorance is bliss, I do not want to be unaware if people’s feelings are at stake.  I know that to get better and to do the right things, it is not only what I do, but what I could have/should have done and didn’t, that counts.  It makes me sad that there are people who I may have hurt, and I am clueless.  Over my lifetime I have found out weeks, months, or even years later about something I could have done differently at the time.  Life is about getting better every day, and part of that means not just what we do, but also the missed opportunities.  I want to work to be aware of my, “sins of omissions” as I work to be a better person and to be aware of other people. 

                                                                                    Have a great week!

                                                                                                Mary

1-2-2015

Mary's Minute

"One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living.  We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon – instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today."
                                                                                                 ― Dale Carnegie

"We are always getting ready to live but never living."
                                                                                                 --Ralph Waldo Emerson

With the holidays behind us and the New Year upon us, it is a time we often reflect and make plans.  The holidays are an example of a time where we put a lot of planning into preparing for a magical moment, which is certainly not a bad thing but if only plan and never do we are missing out on what really matters. The time will never be perfect, but to put off living is one of the greatest mistakes we can make. As we begin a New Year my hope is that we do not put off living and instead can enjoy the roses blooming. Whether it is in our work or personal lives, let's choose to live in the moment and live out our dreams now.
                                                                          Happy New Year!
                                                                          Mary

12-19-2014

Mary’s Minute

 

“Holidays are about experiences and people, and turning into what you feel like doing at the moment.  Enjoy not having to look at a watch.”

                                                                                                                                                ~ Evelyn Glennie

In the hustle and bustle of the season, we feel like we don’t have time to slow down.  The clock becomes our enemy as we rush from one task to another.  It would be nice if we could take Glennie’s advice more often than on holidays.  I think that we all look forward to Christmas so that we can just enjoy the moment and not look at a watch.  The holidays are a good time to reflect on what we really value and try to add more of what is important throughout the rest of year.  Christmas is a time for thinking of others, giving to those who have less, smiling more, saying kind words to strangers, and slowing down and just enjoying the moment.  Each year I tell myself that I will work to add more of what is important in life throughout the entire year.  I love Christmas!  I love the excitement, as well as the hush that makes the entire world glow.  I love giving to others and showing gratitude.  I appreciate the beauty of decorated trees and twinkling lights.  I marvel at the kindness we show to strangers at this time of the year.  I respect the spiritual traditions that make the holiday special.  These are the things I want to be part of my life!  Christmas represents for me all that is good in the world!             

 

Merry Christmas all year long! 

                                                                                                Mary

12-12-2014

Mary’s Minute

 

“People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

~ John Maxwell

                                   

This week I had the pleasure of interviewing several Perry Central seniors as part of an initiative by our guidance department to give students interview practice.  It was a great experience for me on several levels.  First of all, it was great to get to know these students better.  I loved hearing about their plans for the future, their passions, and their interests.  One student talked about his, “hunger for knowledge,” and the places he dreamed of visiting.  Another talked about her dream to work with special needs students because of the enjoyable cadet teaching experience.

 

I also took the opportunity to ask each student what they liked best about Perry Central and how we could improve.  What almost every one of them talked about was our caring teachers.  They talked about how teachers worked to get to know them as people and that they made sure they learned.  We all know we are here for learning, but as Maxwell’s quote reminds us, without caring, learning is irrelevant.  If I had to pick the single most important element of our school climate it would be to have a caring staff.  These students reiterated for me how fortunate we are at Perry Central to have caring teachers and staff members.  I think these students also helped support the notion that it really does matter.  Taking the time to say a kind word or to get to know a student makes a difference!  Our students really do appreciate the caring environment at Perry Central.  I do too!  Thank you for caring!

 

                                                                        Have a great week!

                                                                                                Mary