10-16-2020

Mary's Minute

"Grace will take you places hustling won't."

                                                        - Brené Brown

I have always believed in the power of hard work or "hustling," but this year more than ever I am seeing the power of also giving ourselves grace.  One definition of grace is, "courteous goodwill," and we certainly believe in giving others courteous goodwill, so why not give it to ourselves?  For instance, my goal is to write Mary's Minute on Fridays, but this week I decided to give myself the grace to wait until Saturday.

This has been a year like no other, and I think every one of us has our unique struggles.  Being understanding with ourselves is not a permission to make excuses, but simply treating ourselves with the same kindness we would show to others, recognizing that our feelings and confusion are real. 

In being kind to ourselves and others, I think we will see that we will go places that hard work alone cannot take us.  

The next time we are feeling overwhelmed, sad, confused, or even angry, let's try to remember how we would treat someone else with those emotions.  My guess is that we would want to treat them with courteous goodwill, so please give yourself the grace also!

                                                                        Have a good week!

                                                                                    Mary

10-9-2020

 

Mary’s Minute“Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.”

“Correction does much, but encouragement does more.”

                                                                      ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Critical feedback is an important part of growth.  We learn from our mistakes.  Assessment is important part of the learning process, as teachers provide feedback to help students learn and grow.  Correction does much…

But encouragement does more.  At the beginning of the school year, I asked staff members what they needed from me.  Many said, encouragement. 

Although we strive for internal motivation that helps us depend less on positive reinforcement from others, at the very least we all appreciate praise/reinforcement/encouragement. 

I am grateful for the encouragement I get from others, and I am motivated to do better. 

I see more than ever that people are struggling right now.  I want to encourage my friends and family – and even those outside my immediate circle.  What people are doing right now to not only survive, but thrive, is nothing short of amazing. 

 My goal is to see all the good in others and remember to tell them! 

                                                            Have a great fall break!

                                                                                     Mary

 

10-2-2020

 

Mary’s Minute“Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.”

“Choices are the hinges of destiny.”

                                                  ~ Edwin Markham

I feel like in many ways we have been in limbo for the last 6 months since the pandemic started.  It doesn’t feel like we are choosing much of anything, but rather just “being.”  It feels at times that we are just holding on and not choosing. 

 What we need to remember is that by not choosing, we are still choosing.  Doing nothing is a passive choice.  I am not an economics theory expert, so my oldest son might correct me on this, but I think there is a parallel between making no choice and opportunity cost.  By not choosing, what are we losing?

 Life is full of choices – active and passive.  We need to choose wisely, and also remember that things we do and things we don’t do are choices.

 This continues to be a challenging time, and I am amazed at the positivity I see every day!  I want to remember that I need to make active choices, and not just passively let the world make choices for me because no choice is a choice. 

                                                    Have a great week!

                                                                      Mary

9-24-2020

 

Mary’s Minute“Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you anywhere.”

“Hope is the only thing stronger than fear.”

                                                                                  ~ Robert Ludlum

I recently listened to an interview with an NYC teacher talking about schools reopening.  The word that kept coming up over and over was anxiety.  I think teachers, and in fact nearly everyone going through this pandemic, can relate to feeling anxious through this uncertain time. 

I see the remedy for the anxiety we are feeling as hope.  Hope allows us to trust that things will be okay, that there will be answers for unanswered questions, and that we will regain many of the things in life that we feel we have lost.  The truth is that plans are really only our preferences, and this pandemic has shown us just that.  The pandemic has made planning difficult, but when we think hopefully, planning is possible.

We need to remember that hope is stronger than fear.  The fear that people have experienced and are experiencing is very real, but hope is stronger.– English proverb

                                                           With hope,

Mary

9-18-2020

Mary’s Minute

"The one who falls and gets up is stronger than the one who never tried. Do not fear failure but rather fear not trying."

                                                                  - Roy T. Bennett

We all have times when we don’t feel like we are on top of our game – well, I guess I shouldn’t speak for all of you, but I sure do.  What if when we fall we didn’t see it as failure, but as a win because we tried? 

I am trying not to dwell on the funk that the pandemic has created, but the truth is that it continues to be a challenging time. For me the surest way to see the positive within the negative, is to remember that in trying and getting back up, we become stronger.  The fact that life gives us challenges and opportunities to fail is something to celebrate because we have chances to learn and grow through our mishaps.   

In this way we can celebrate 2020 because it has given us plenty of opportunities to grow!  And so, we should celebrate falling because in falling we can get back up!

                                                                            Have a great week!

                                                                                               Mary

9-11-2020

Mary’s Minute

“Flexibility is the key to stability.”

~ John Wooden

This quote reminds me of the paradoxical idea that the only real constant is change.  John Wooden was likely talking about basketball, but he could have been talking about a pandemic.  The only way that we can maintain any sense of stability in our work or personal lives during this crazy is to be flexible. 

For instance, the guidance that we receive from the health department literally changes weekly.  If we are not flexible, our plans would quickly fall apart.

The same is true in our personal lives.  The pandemic has changed the way we do things.  For some people, it has created major challenges, and for some of us it has just knocked us out of our routines and filled us with anxiety because of the uncertainty of the future.  When will we be able to travel regularly?  Will we be able to continue school in person?  How long will we be wearing masks?  Will someone in our family become ill?  The only way that we can feel at all grounded in this period of uncertainty is to embrace flexibility, remembering that the path to stability is flexibility. 

I wish you well!

                                                                                                Mary

9-4-2020

 

Mary’s Minute

“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.”

                                                ~ Heraclitus

 

We all have unique backgrounds and experiences, so when are exposed to something we each see it through our own unique lens.  Scientists work hard to create experiments that are neutral, so that outcomes can be controlled, but in real life, there is no neutrality. 

For instance, we did a survey for staff because it is important to know how people are feeling and to gain insight about how we can improve.  People in the same buildings, who theoretically had the exact same experience and access to information, saw things drastically differently.  Fortunately, more people viewed them in positive way than negative, but the negative responses are equally important.  All insight is important because ultimately reality for an individual is their personal perception. 

The same is true for teaching.  A teacher can present material (“teach”), but the ultimate experience that each student receives (the “learning”), can be very different among students. 

I want to constantly be aware that I cannot assume that everyone sees the world the same way I do or has the same experiences that I do.  To be a better communicator, I need to remember that the river and the person stepping into it are never the same.

                                                Have a great long weekend!

                                                                             Mary