1-29-2021

 

Mary’s Minute

 

“The purpose of life is a life of purpose.”

                                                         ~ Robert Byrne

I recently read an article that said one characteristic of individuals who lived to be over 100 was having a purpose in life.  We know that the success of a thriving organization is linked to individuals in the organization working towards a shared purpose.

Sometimes we call this our “why.”  Why do we do what we do?  Why do we get up in the morning?  Why do we get excited about life?  I have always felt blessed that as an educator it is easier to understand my why, but for me it is even broader than this. 

For me, it is a simple obligation to make the world a better place.  Granted, I am humble, knowing that I can only do small things, but I certainly strive to leave things a little better than I found them. 

The notion of linking having a purpose to happiness and long-life shouldn’t come as a surprise, but it does provide a source of reflection.  I think in different phases of our lives, our purpose changes a lot, perhaps with an overarching theme.  For me, making the world a better place looked somewhat different when I was raising young children then it might now.  I also think that we all are struggling to some degree to find our purpose in the very different world we have been forced to live in through the pandemic.  Reflection has been good for me, and I hope to keep working towards a life of purpose.

                                                              Have a good week!

             Mary

                            

 

Mary’s Minute

"First, accept sadness. Realize that without losing, winning isn't so great.”

                                                                                    ~ Alyssa Milano

No one likes to be sad.  In fact, we spend a lot of time focused on being happy and making others happy.  The reality is that sometimes sad things happen.  We see our loved ones’ suffering, and we are sad for them.  We have all been in a situation we are feeling real grief or a time when we have watched those we love grieving. 

There is not any easy response.  The sadness is real, and it is a reminder of what we had.  Dr. Seuss said, “Don’t cry because it is over, smile because it happened,” which I love.  But I also realize that crying over a loss is okay and necessary. 

Jess and Amanda lost their sweet Jamison last night.  He was part of our family since Jess’ college days when as a bouncy Palmerian puppy he lived like a prince in a fraternity house.  I am sad to lose my grand dog, but mostly my heart breaks for Jess and Amanda.  There aren’t any words that can help, and all I know to do is to understand that sadness is real and a reminder of the sweetness of joy that was and will be again.

                                                                                       ~ Mary         

1-15-2021

                                       

Mary’s Minute

"Be mindful when it comes to your words. A string of some that don't mean much to you, may stick with someone else for a lifetime."

                                                                      -       Rachel Wolchin

Words are so powerful -- words that we speak, words that we write, and even words that we think. 

I love words, and for me they are my lifeline.  I love words so much that I have come to realize that I even like to decorate with them, with pillows and plagues filling my home with words and quotes, like “Live, Laugh, Love.”  Words make me happy!

People who work with me know that I process by spilling ideas out with words.  Sometimes I wish I had a mute button, so I could be muted until I get the idea worked out so those around me could be spared all of my verbal processing! 

Words that we share through writing and speaking can have tremendous power and influence to harm or heal.  Often, we don’t realize the influence our words can have. 

As adults many of us remember words that were spoken to us as children that have stuck with us.  My kids remember me saying things to them they I don’t remember even saying!  Over my career I have taught several hundred students – from preschoolers to adults.  Sometimes years later, former students will tell me something I said to them, of which I have zero recollection.  At my age I don’t have a lot of memories from my early years, but then there are tiny moments and words I remember. When I was about five years old, I went with my mom to visit her Aunt Frances in the hospital in Chicago.  I don’t remember the details, but I think couldn’t go to the room so I sat in the waiting room.  (I know we wouldn’t do that today, but this was 1970!)  I walked into the hospital gift shop, and the lady behind the counter told me sternly that I wasn’t allowed to be in the shop alone.  I know she was just doing her job, but her words have stuck with me (and still hurt me a little bit) 50 years later!  I don’t blame her, but I want to use it as a lesson for me to use my words wisely.

It can be empowering and exciting, but also a little scary.  Sometimes we want to speak with influence, and our words are forgotten.  While at other times, we say or write something flippantly, and it is long remembered.  We just need to remember that words matter! 

                                                    Have a great week!

                                                                Mary

1-8-2021

 

Mary’s Minute

“It is unwise to be too sure of one’s own wisdom.”

                                                             Mahatma Gandhi

I had the great fortune to be raised in a home filled with love and support.  My parents made me feel secure and special.  My mom, who still showers me that same love and support, also taught me about humility.  She didn’t say it often, and never said it in a direct or derogatory way, but the words stay with me and motivate me to stay humble and kind: “Who in the heck do you think you are?”  Again, I want to stress that this was not something she ever directed to me in anger or disappointment; it was more of a general statement – not directed at any “you” but a statement of humanity.  It was her way of saying that all humans are capable and deserving.

We are all capable of doing great things and all deserving of great love, and my mom taught me that we need to do that with the understanding that all of us have that capacity and are equally deserving. 

 When we get too sure of ourselves or feel entitled, we will certainly stumble because we fail to see the good in others.

Humility is a gift.  There is an old country song with the sarcastic chorus, “Lord, it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every way.”  Maybe it is easy for me to be humble because I know that I am far from perfect. 

I am grateful to my parents who helped instill in me a balance of self-respect and confidence with humility, understanding that alone I am so little.  It is wise to never think we are too wise.  True wisdom comes through working together and knowing that all of us are capable and deserving. 

                                                                         Humbly yours,

                                                                                    Mary

 

1-1-2021

 

Mary’s Minute

“Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.”

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

“Celebrate what you want to see more of.”

~ Tom Peters

 Happy New Year!  It is the first day of 2021 – a new beginning.  I like new beginnings.  January 1 seems to be one of the grandest new beginnings.  As educators, we often use the first day of school as a new beginning.  Each new season is a new beginning, and so are milestones in our life.  They are all rather arbitrary.  Each sunrise is a chance for a new beginning; each breath we take is a chance to begin anew.  I think that major milestones provide a chance to be reflective about our past and plan/dream of our future. 

I admit I live my life more in big picture mode and am not as good at minute goal setting.  I certainly could benefit at times by being more detail oriented, but overall, I like big picture thinking.  For example, when my kids were growing up, we didn’t have a long list of rules to follow.  We had one rule – love one another because when you love one another you do the right things for each other.

I admire the idea of setting goals, but I am more inclined to embrace life with an attitude of waking up each day with an attitude of making it the best day ever and to embrace more of what we want life to be. 

I do plan to make a vision board today in order to manifest my goals for 2021 and use New Year’s Day as a time of reflection about 2020 and how I can be a better person in 2021, but I also will look to every day in 2021 as a chance for a new beginning and a chance to make each day – each moment – better than the one before.

                                                             Happy New Year!

                                                                        Mary